I hate my job!

[Diomedes]

^^^
true talk

[Eagles 3x]

When you have an "I Hate My Job" day, try this. On your way home from work, stop at your pharmacy and go to the thermometer section and purchase a rectal thermometer made by Johnson &Johnson.?? Be very sure you get this brand.

When you get home, lock your doors, draw the curtains and disconnect the phone so you will not be disturbed. Change into nice comfortable clothing and sit in your favorite chair. Open the package and remove the thermometer.

Now, carefully place it on a table or a surface so that it will not become chipped or broken. Now the fun part begins. Take out the literature and read it carefully. You will notice in small print there is a statement, "Every Rectal Thermometer made by Johnson & Johnson is personally tested". Now, close your eyes and repeat out loud five times, "I am so glad I do not work in the Thermometer quality control at Johnson & Johnson
THERE IS ALWAYS SOMEONE ELSE WITH A JOB THAT IS MORE OF A PAIN IN THE ASS THAN YOURS.

[dis12]

Nobody in their right mind should look for a SAP job.

that's why we are called SAPs, duh.

[PoopyfaceMcGee]

When you have an "I Hate My Job" day, try this. On your way home from work, stop at your pharmacy and go to the thermometer section and purchase a rectal thermometer made by Johnson &Johnson.?? Be very sure you get this brand.

When you get home, lock your doors, draw the curtains and disconnect the phone so you will not be disturbed. Change into nice comfortable clothing and sit in your favorite chair. Open the package and remove the thermometer.

Now, carefully place it on a table or a surface so that it will not become chipped or broken. Now the fun part begins. Take out the literature and read it carefully. You will notice in small print there is a statement, "Every Rectal Thermometer made by Johnson & Johnson is personally tested". Now, close your eyes and repeat out loud five times, "I am so glad I do not work in the Thermometer quality control at Johnson & Johnson
THERE IS ALWAYS SOMEONE ELSE WITH A JOB THAT IS MORE OF A PAIN IN THE ASS THAN YOURS.

Thanks for posting your e-mail forwards on this board.

[dis12]

I don't feel empowered.  Just sort of freed. Don't know how the hell I'm gonna support myself, but I'm glad to hell to be done with these people.

I assume you are just watching ESPN, NFL channel, etc and drinking 24/7...at least for a few more days...till the bonus $ runs out.

[dis12]

Dio freakin out at his last day on the job...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z45sAYCObjk

[Sgt PSN]

I just submitted to take a week of vacation and on the request forms we have to sign this "statement of understanding" before our leave request can be approved:

I recognize the contribution I make to my fellow Marines, Sailors, and Civilian Marines of my unit, my brothers and sisters throughout the Marine Corps, and the Marines and Sailors deployed in defense of freedom around the world. Essential to our mission, I pledge to maintain my commitment with a constant display of honor and professionalism. I will plan ahead, minimize risks to my safety and return from leave prepared to continue "the fight."

Awesome. 

[ice grillin you]

haha...thats great

[rjs246]

Translation:

I recognize that herpes is preferable to the AIDS and that therefore, after traipsing around the world and sleeping with barskanks, the contribution I make to my fellow Marines, Sailors, and Civilian Marines of my unit, my brothers and sisters throughout the Marine Corps, and the Marines and Sailors deployed in defense of freedom around the world should be one of dull herpes itch, rather than emaciating AIDS death. I'll pick my skanks carefully. Essential to our mission, I pledge to maintain my commitment with a constant display of honor, alcoholism, bar-fighting prowess and headbutting. I will plan ahead, until I am too drunk to do so. I will minimize risks to my safety, although this is not a concern since I am a Marine and impervious to the physical ramifications of my actions while on leave. And finally, I will return from leave prepared to continue "the fight" and face any and all paternity proceedings like a man.

[Zanshin]

I'm stuck in Milan all week for a meeting I have next to no role at.  I've been out of my room since 6:30 am, and I just got back from a four-hour dinner with a bunch of drunk corporate dudes at 11:30 pm.  I'm beat, and I miss my family.  Milan, by the way, is sort of a dirtier New York, but with more graffiti and beggers.  Of course, I'll get back over the weekend, try to recover from the jet lag...and I'll get back to the office and have to catch up on everything I missed this week.  And everyone back at the office will think I had some sort of awesome vacation abroad, and be relentless in wanting even more crap.

[MDS]

Road trip to La Salle this weekend. Exciting.

[Diomedes]

I have two more days to show up at work.  Then I'm free.

[dis12]

I have two more days to show up at work.  Then I'm free.

why not take each day with an 8-hour lunch.  just make sure the last paycheck will clear.

[Diomedes]

I drank four or five glasses of champagne and a nice snifter of Grand Marnier at lunch today, returned to the office for a shot of palenka, and then promplty left.

yesterday I was taken to lunch.  today, literally breakfast lunch and dinner (for which I'm preparing with a nice toke as I type) and tomorrow for lunch, after which I will be drunk and quit early on my last day.

farg work.

[dis12]

I drank four or five glasses of champagne and a nice snifter of Grand Marnier at lunch today, returned to the office for a shot of palenka, and then promplty left.

yesterday I was taken to lunch.  today, literally breakfast lunch and dinner (for which I'm preparing with a nice toke as I type) and tomorrow for lunch, after which I will be drunk and quit early on my last day.

farg work.

sounds like a great place, with caring co-workers....can't figure out why you wanna leave??